Photographic Memories

January 27, 2008 – Our Town - the Tracy Press

A few weeks before Christmas a friend suggested that I might like to have one of those new digital picture frames as a Christmas gift. “Please no!” was my immediate response…better said; “my outburst".

“Whoa…that was an interesting reaction. Sounds like someone has “ issues” around photographs.”

He was right. I did have issues. I couldn’t imagine making room for one more photo’s picture frame – even if it was digital.

During the holidays, I pulled several photos from my bookshelves to make room for Christmas cards. Once the holiday was over I took down the cards and realized that I like the “spacious look” so I decided not to put all of the photos back up. But who would get edited out?
I have a beautiful photo of my brother, sister-in-law and 3-nephews, but the photo is now twenty years old and my nephews are fully grown men, with families of their own.

“This photo needs to go away – but to where? Do I toss it out? Put it into some photo box to forever live on the closet shelf?”

Then there are the three individual photos of my great-nephews Grant, 13; Ben, 11; and Luke, 8. Each year, my Sister-In-Law (their grandmother) dutifully sends me their class picture. But now, I wonder why does she do this? In the last 13 years, I have seen Grant 3 times; Luke twice and I’ve never met Ben. I’m sure they’re delightful young men, but in reality – I don’t know them. And I doubt if they have any idea who their great-uncle Jack might be. Swallowing hard, their photos went to the pile designated “photo box”.

Then there was the beautifully frame photos of great friends from the late ‘80’s. . Gosh we had some good times together – but now? I have no idea where they live or what they’re doing. I miss them, but it’s time – into the photo box pile they went.

I had a system going. This “cleansing thing” felt okay. If I haven’t seen the person in 7 years, I snatched the photo from the shelf. But quickly I hit a road bump. What about the friends that are gone? As I held a photo of Gary (one of my best buddies) I realized that this “cleansing process” had taken an ugly turn and was becoming more difficult. I had six different photos depicted highlights of our 15 years of friendship. “But Gary died in 1992; isn’t it time?” I heard myself negotiating with myself. “Okay Jack, pick one. Pick your favorite photo of Gary and leave that one up. It’s time to put the rest away.”

Now I’m not someone that lives in the past. My life is about the future. I want my bookshelves to be filled with photos of the loving, caring and wonderful people that surround me today. I heard myself saying: “This task shouldn’t be this hard. If it’s been 7 years – they come down.” Then my eyes came across the photos of my deceased parents. “When is it time to put their photos away?” I asked. The seven year rule just didn’t seem right – it didn’t feel respectful.

“Just one - but which one?” I pondered. “Do I keep up the photo of my mother at 85 years of age, or the one when she was 50 and we visited the Pacific Ocean for the first time? Maybe I keep the photo of us together, taken on my first day of school. Gosh, I love that photo.” I had to stop. I had to take a break and walk out of the room. I knew there had to be another way to deal with this. “Maybe that digital photo frame is a good idea after all.”

Off to Linens and Things I went. I found it – right near all the other popular must have items for Christmas 2007 – my little 5 x 7 digital photo frame. I spent the rest of the evening scanning photos onto my computer and then on to the frame’s memory disk. Soon over 50 photos had been loaded. The new picture frame took its rightful place right at eye level on the second shelf of my bookcase.

Now, each time I look up at the bookcase I see a different photo. Each photo remains on the screen for several minutes, then it gently fades away and another photo appears in its place. If I choose the “random select” option, I never know which photo is going to appear next. I love it. Each time I look up a new photo greats me; it’s as if an old friend or dear relative pops in for a surprise visit triggering the recall of a wonderful moment in time….it’s no wonder they say a picture is worth a 1000 words…… - Jack Elliott